与英语有关的故事

与英语有关的故事篇一

关于爱的英语故事

A Story about Love

He met her at a party. She was outstanding; many boys were after her, but nobody paid any attention to him. After the party, he invited her for coffee. She was surprised. So as not to appear rude, she went along.

As they sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything. Suddenly, he asked the waiter, ‘Could you please bring me some salt? I`d like to put it in my coffee.’

The girl stared at him. He turned red, but when the salt came, he put it in his coffee and drank. Curious, she asked, ‘Why salt with coffee?’He explained, ‘When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea. I liked playing in the sea...I enjoyed its salty taste, it was like salty coffee. Now every time I drink it, I think of my childhoodand my hometown. I miss it and my parents, who are still there.’

She was deeply touched. A man who can admit that he`s homesick must love his home and care about his family. He must be responsible. She talked too, about her faraway hometown, her childhood and her family. That was the start to their love story.

They continued to date each other. She found that he met all her requirements. He was kind, warm, and careful. And to think she would have missed the catch if not for the salty coffee.

So they married and lived happily together. Every time she made coffee for him, she put in some salt, the way he liked it.

After 40 years, he passed away and left her a letter which said, ‘My dearest, pleased forgive my life-long life. Remember our first date? I was so nervous I asked for salt instead of sugar. But if I could live a second time I would want for us to be together again, even if it meant that I had to drink salty coffee for the rest my life.’

与英语有关的故事篇二

英语小故事(父亲与儿子)

Daddy, may I please borrow $10? A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了？” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？” “ 她是个卖糖果的。” A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door. “Daddy, may I ask you a question?” “Yeah sure, what is it?” replied the man. “Daddy, how much do you make an hour?” “That’s none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?” the man said angrily. I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?” pleaded the little boy. “If you must know, I make $20 an hour.” “Oh,” the little boy replied, with his head down. Looking up, he said, “Daddy, may I please borrow $10?” The father was furious, “If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I work

hard every day for such childish behavior.” The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door. The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy’s questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money? After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think: Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $10 and he really didn’t ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy’s room and opened the door. “Are you asleep, son?” He asked. No daddy, I’m awake,” replied the boy. “I’ve been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier,” said the man, “It’s been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here’s the $10you asked for.” The little boy sat straight up, smiling. “Oh, thank you daddy!” He yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills. The man, seeing that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, then looked up at his father. “Why do you want more money if you already have some?” the father grumbled. “Because I didn’t have enough, but now I do,” the little boy replied. “Daddy, I have $20 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.” 一名男子来到下班晚了，累了，恼怒，发

现他5岁的儿子在等着他家门口。 “爸爸，我问你一个问题吗？” “是的肯定，那是什么？”回答该名男子。 “爸爸，你多少要一个小时？” “这是你的事情。你为什么问这样的事？“那人愤怒地说。 “我只是想知道的。请告诉我，你多少钱一小时做？“承认的小男孩。 “如果你要知道，我要20元，一个小时。” “哦，”小男孩回答他的头，下降。展望时，他说：“爸爸，请允许我借10元？” 父亲是愤怒，“如果你问的唯一原因是这样你就可以借钱买一个愚蠢的玩具或其他一些废话，那么你自己直接游行到您的房间睡觉。想想你为什么如此自私。我努力工作对这种幼稚的行为每天都在。“ 小男孩悄悄地来到他的房间，关上了门。该名男子坐了下来，开始变得甚至对小男孩的问题，愤怒了。他怎么敢提出这样的问题只得到一些钱呢？在大约一个小时左右，该男子平静下来，并开始想：也许他有什么真正需要的，买的十元，他真的不是为钱，往往要求。 该名男子来到小男孩的房间的门，把门打开。 “你睡着了，儿子？”他问。 “没有爸爸，我很清醒，”孩子回答说。 “我一直在想，也许我对你太硬早些时候，”那人说：“这是一个漫长的一天，我对你拿出我的恶化。下面是$ 10you要求。“ 小男孩坐在马上站起来，面带微笑。 “哦，谢谢你爸爸！”他喊道。然后，在他的枕头达到他掏出一些皱巴巴的法律草案。该名男子，看到这名男孩已经有钱，开始变得愤怒。小男孩慢慢地数出他的钱，然后看着他的父亲了。 “为什么你想要更多的钱，如果你已经有了一些？”父亲抱怨。 “因为我没有足够的，但我现在看，”小男孩回答。 “爸爸，我有20美元了。我可以买一小时的时间？请<a

name=baidusnap0></a>明天</B>一早回家。我想和你吃饭。“ 亲情很可贵，因为它是世界上最无私，最真诚的感情 也是我们灵魂最后的家园 它值得我们去珍惜，去浇灌，去培育。 Thank you!!! * *

与英语有关的故事篇三

英语小故事

The Thirsty Pigeon口渴的鸽子{与英语有关的故事}.

A PIGEON, oppressed by excessive thirst, saw a goblet of water painted on a signboard. Not supposing it to be only a picture, she flew towards it with a loud whir and

unwittingly dashed against the signboard, jarring herself terribly. Having broken her wings by the blow, she fell to the ground, and was caught by one of the bystanders.

Zeal should not outrun discretion.

有只鸽子口渴得很难受，看见画板上画着一个水瓶，以为是真的。他立刻呼呼地猛飞过 去，不料一头碰撞在画板上，折断了翅膀，摔在地上，被人轻易地捉住了。{与英语有关的故事}.

这是说，有些人想急于得到所需的东西，一时冲动，草率从事，就会身遭不幸。

风和太阳(The Wind And The Sun)

One day the wind said to the sun, “Look at that man walking along the road. I can get his cloak off more quickly than you can.”

“We will see about that,” said the sun. “I will let you try first.”

So the wind tried to make the man take off his cloak. He blew and blew, but the man only pulled his cloak more closely around himself.

“I give up,” said the wind at last. “I cannot get his cloak off.” Then the sun tried. He shone as hard as he could. The man soon became hot and took off his cloak.

(有一天风跟太阳说: “看看那个沿着路上走的人.我可以比你快让他把披风脱下来.)

(“我们等着看吧,”太阳说, “我让你先试.)

(因此风尝试让那个人把披风脱下来.他用力地吹,可是那个人把披风拉得更紧.)

(“我放弃了,”风最后说, “我无法让他把披风脱下来.”然后由太阳试试看.他尽可能地晒他.不久,那个人很热就把披风脱下来了.)

Little Robert

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday？"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents

more. But why are you so interested in the old woman？"

"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”

“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”

“她是个卖糖果的。”

Belling the cat

long ago,there was a big cat in the house.He caught many mice while they were stealing food. One day the mice bad a meeting to talk about the way to deal with

their common enemy.Some said this,andsome said that.

At last a young mouse got up,and said that he had a good idea.

“We could tie a bell around the neck of the cat.Then when he comes near,we can hear the sound of the bell,and run away.”

Everyone approved of this proposal,but an old wise mouse got up and said,“That is all very well,but who will tie the bell to the cat？”The mice looked at each other,but nobody spoke.{与英语有关的故事}.

给猫挂铃铛

很久以前，房子里有只大猫。他抓住了许多偷吃粮食的老鼠。一天，老鼠们开会讨论对付猫的办法。有的说这样，有有的说那样。最后一只小老鼠站起来，说他有一个好办法：我们给猫的脖子上拴一个铃当，当猫走近的时候，我们就可以听到铃声，就可以逃跑了。每个老鼠都同意这个建议，但是一只老老鼠站起来说：那谁去给猫戴上铃当呢？老鼠们你看我，我看你，没人出声了

The Dog In The Manger（牛槽里的狗）

Once a dog was taking a nap in the manger of an ox. It was full of hay. But soon the ox came back from his work to the manger. He wanted to eat his own hay. Then the dog awoke, stood up and barked at the ox. The ox said to the dog, “Do you want to eat this hay, too?”

“Of course not,” said the dog.

“Then, go away and let me eat my own hay.”

“Oh, no. You go away and let me sleep.”

“What a selfish dog! He will neither eat the hay himself, nor let me eat it !” said the ox to himself.

与英语有关的故事篇四

英语小故事-聪明的猴子

A Smart Turtle

Hello,everyone.My name is ZhengNan. You can call me Chip.I’m 9 years old.I am a student.I like English very much . Today ,I want to tell you an English story, A Smart Turtle.

One day,A tiger is very hungry, he is looking for food. He sees a frog .

“Ha ha ha! A frog! My dinner!”So he runs to the frog.

Behind the tiger, there is a turtle. The turtle sees it; he bites the tiger’s tail.

“Ouch.......!”The tiger shouts and looks back.

The frog hears the voice and jumps into the river.

Gua gua gua“Thank you, little turtle.”

“You are welcome.”

But the tiger is very angry.

“Turtle! I’ll throw you into the sky!”

“Thank you, I like flying in the sky.”

The tiger stops.“No, I will throw you into the river.”

“Oh,no, no! I can’t swim. I will... I will die if you throw me into the river.”

Then the tiger throws the turtle into the river .

“Ha ha ha.You’ve been tricked. Thank you, Mr. Tiger. Bye-bye.”

The turtle and the frog swim away together.

That’s all ,thank you .Please remember me--- ZhengNan.Goodbye!

1 “ah.......”

与英语有关的故事篇五

教学中经常给学生讲一些与英语知识有关的小故事

英语教学叙事

教学中经常给学生讲一些与英语知识有关的小故事，这样会使得课堂生动，活泼；又加深了学生对知识的理解与记忆。如：教学英语时间表达方式时，教会了学生“先分后点，先点后分”的两种表示法，学生在熟悉英文的数字前提下，对“先点后分”的方法接受快些，对“先分后点”的方法还有点绕不过弯来，这个时候我一抬头，正好看到四班的墙面上挂了一个时钟，我就把它取了下来，用手拨弄着时针与分针，孩子们看到老师拿了实物，开始感兴趣了，并且开始踊跃 举手发言，分别用正读法和逆读法来朗读时间，班级有大约2分之1的学生已经能熟练掌握这个用法了，但是还有部分同学不能掌握逆读法。我有点着急，这时，我灵机一动，想起了我在教授初三时做过的一个阅读理解小故事，有一位伦敦的老太太要乘火车去看她儿子，来到车站后，她不知道火车到站的时间，这时有一个小孩在车站附近玩耍，老太太就走过去问小孩“火车几点到站？”小孩只是拿着玩具枪对着老太太“嘟嘟嘟”“嘟嘟嘟”，就大笑着走了，老太太很纳闷，这孩子怎么这么不懂礼貌，一会儿后，老太太终于明白了，说这孩子真聪明，他已经告诉我火车的时间了，原来是“two to two”学生听后，恍然大悟，记忆深刻，收到了预期的效果。

再有本学期第二单元，教授“where is the post office?”。讲授询问地点以及给别人指路，这个单元内容多，单词多句型多，而且还需要学生在课本上给其他人指路，这个环节总是有许多方向感很差

的同学分不清怎么走好这条路，有的同学不能把自己想象成课本上的人，总是理解不了怎么走到的目的地。这个时候我想何不如把课本与实际相结合，于是找了几个平时比较活泼而且善于表现自己的同学，先让他们走到讲台前，我说了几个关于方向的口令，例如 “turn left” , “turn right” , “go straight” , “stop”。有的同学左右分不清，惹得其他同学哈哈大笑，我只好提示他写字的是右手，然后我把班级的过道当成课本上的第一大街，第二大街，把有的同学的座位当成是邮局，商店，或者是公用电话，然后让一个同学站出来，站在指定位置，根据课本的内容向目的地走，然后另外一名同学负责口述英语，发布指令，这样书上的内容一下立体化了，生动了。同学们都踊跃地举起小手，这样再把同学们所说的内容总结到黑板上，在整理下来。下课铃响了，同学们都说时间好快这节课真有意思，听着这些话我也很高兴说明这节课我成功了，把这个单元的难点通过与实际运用结合让同学们都高兴的掌握了。

我上面提到的例子，是很平常、很普通的事情。我们做教师的几乎每个人都能够遇到，但要真能够做到恰如其分，得心应手，却也不是那么容易，我想通过自身的努力，加上对于教育事业的热爱，加上对自己所教学生的深厚的爱，我想我会把这种应对此类“难题”的能力提升为一门教育艺术的。

王丽丽

与英语有关的故事篇六

英语经典幽默故事

My First and My Last

When George was thirty-five, he bought a small plane and learned to fly it. He soon became very good and made his plane do all kinds of tricks.

George had a friend. His name was Mark. One day George offered to take Mark up in his plane. Mark thought, "I've travelled in a big plane several times, but I've never been in a small one, so I'll go."

They went up, and George flew around for half an hour and did all kinds of tricks in the air. When they came down again, Mark was very glad to be back safely, and he said to his friend in a shaking voice, "Well, George, thank you very much for those two trips in your plane." Gerogy was very surprised and said, "Two trips?"

"Yes, my first and my last," answered Mark.

第一次与最后一次

乔治35岁时买了架小型飞机，并开始学习驾驶。不久，他就能很娴熟地驾机做各种各样的特技飞行了。

乔治有个朋友名叫马克。一天，乔治主动邀请马克乘他的飞机上天兜一圈。马克心想，“我乘大客机飞行过好几次，还从来没有乘过小飞机，我不妨试一试。” 升空后，乔治飞了有半个小时，在空中做了各种各样的飞行特技。

后来他们着陆了。马克很高兴能够安全返回地面。他用颤抖的声音对他的朋友说：“乔治，非常感谢你让我乘小飞机做了两次飞行。”

乔治非常吃惊地问：“两次飞行？”

“是的，我的第一次和最后一次。”马克答道。

First Flight

Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.

His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.{与英语有关的故事}.

After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?" "Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground."

第一次坐飞机

约翰逊先生从前未乘过飞机，他读过许多关于飞行事故的报道。所以，有一天一位朋友邀请他乘自己的小飞机飞行时，约翰逊先生非常担心，不敢接受。不过，由于朋友不断保证说飞行是很安全的，约翰逊先生终于被说服了，登上了飞机。

他的朋友启动引擎开始在机场跑道上滑行。约翰逊先生听说飞行中最危险的是起飞与降落，所以他吓得紧闭双眼。

过了一两分钟，他睁开双眼朝窗外望去，接着对朋友说道：“看下面那些人，他们看起来就象蚂蚁一样小，是不是？”

“那些就是蚂蚁，”他的朋友答道，“我们还在地面上。”

A Nail Or A Fly?

An old gentleman whose eyesight was failing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of wine in each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he

hung them on, the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor. When a waitress discovered what had happened, she showed deep sympathy for him and decided to do him a favour.

So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nail exactly where the fly had stayed.

Now the old man entered his room. The smell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident. When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there again! He walked to it carefully adn slapped it with all his strength. On hearing a loud cry, the kind-hearted waitress rushed in. To her great surprise, the poor old man was there sitting on the floor, his teeth clenched and his right hand bleeding!

钉子还是苍蝇？

一位视力正在衰退的老绅士住进了一家旅馆的客房。他双手各拿一瓶酒。在墙上有只苍蝇，他误以为是枚钉子。他把两只瓶子朝上一挂，瓶子掉下来摔碎了，酒洒了一地。一个女服务员发现发生的事情以后，对他深表同情，决定帮他个忙。

于是，第二天早上他到楼顶花园散步时，她把一枚钉子钉在了苍蝇停过的地方。 这里，老人回到了房里。倒洒的酒味让他想起了那件事。他抬头往墙上一看，苍蝇又停在了那儿!他轻手轻脚地走近，使尽全力拍了一掌。听到一声大叫，好心的女服务员冲进房来。让她大为吃惊的是，可怜的老头正坐在地板上，牙关紧咬，右手滴血不止。 I'll See to the Rest

A guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage.

"Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!"

"Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back.

"You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest."

其余的事由我负责

一位车上的列车员刚发出信号让火车启动，这时他看见一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站台上一节打开的车厢门旁边，跟车厢里另一位漂亮姑娘在说话。

“快点，小姐!”他喊道：“请把门关上。”

“噢，我还没有和妹妹吻别呢。”她回答道。

“请把门关上好了，”列车员说：“其余的事由我负责。”

Chaude and Cold

A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. "This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked C gave me boiling water."

"But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude - French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal."

"Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked C."

"Of course," said the manager, "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city." 热与冷

蒙特利尔自助餐厅的一位顾客拧开盥洗室的龙头，结果被水烫伤了。“这太可恶了，”他抱怨道，“标着C的龙头流出的是开水。”

“可是，先生，C代表Chaude－法语里代表„热‟。如果您居住在蒙特利尔的话就得知道这一点。”

“等等，”那位顾客咆哮一声，“另外一个龙头同样标的是C。”

“当然，”经理说道：“它代表冷。毕竟，蒙特利尔是个双语城市。”

A Soldier's Brilliant Idea

Mr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by air. He liked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already had been taken except for one. There was a soldier sitting in the seat beside this one, and Mr. Robinson was surprised that he had not taken the one by the window; but, anyhow, he at once went towards it.

When he reached it, however, he saw that there was a notice on it. It was written in ink and said, "This seat is preserved for proper load balance, thank you." Mr Robinson had never seen such an unusual notice in a plane before, but he thought that the plane must be carrying something particularly heavy in it, so he walked on and found another empty seat, not beside a window, to sit in.

Two or three people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice and went on, when the plane was nearly full, a very beautiful girl hurried into the plane. The soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in, quickly took the notice off the seat beside himself and in this way succeededin having the company of the girl during the whole trip.

士兵的高招

由于生意方面的事，罗宾逊先生得出趟门。因为有点紧急，他决定坐飞机。乘机旅行时，他喜欢靠窗坐，故而一登机，他就寻找一个靠窗的座位。他发现只有一个靠窗的座位还空着。在那空座位边坐着一名士兵。令罗宾逊先生纳闷的是，这位士兵没有坐靠窗的位置。罗宾逊先生不管那些，他马上径直朝那个空座位走去。

然而，等到了那儿，他看见座位上有则启事，是用钢笔写的：“为保持装载平衡，特预设该位置，谢谢合作。”罗宾逊先生还从来没有在飞机上见过如此不同寻常的启事。不过，他想飞机上一定装了什么特别重的物品，于是他找了个不靠窗的位置。

又有两三个乘客试图坐在那个士兵旁的靠窗座位上，他们看到那则启事就走开了。当快满座时，一位非常美丽的姑娘匆匆走进机舱。一直在注意进舱旅客的那个士兵赶紧拿掉他旁边空座位上的启事。士兵用这种办法，成功地找到了一位姑娘一路作伴。 New Discovery

A hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Entering an office building, he saw a pudgy older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door slid open and a beautiful young model stepped off the elevator.

Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled, "I should have brought my wife!"

新发现

一个乡下人第一次到大城市游逛。他走进一座大楼，看见一个岁数很大的矮胖女人迈进一个小房间。房间的门随后关上，有几个灯在闪亮。一会儿，门开了，电梯里走出一位年青漂亮的女模特。

乡下人惊奇地眨着眼睛，慢吞吞地说：“我应该把我的老婆带来!”

A Bad Impression

Six people were travelling in a compartment on a train. Five of them were quiet and well behaved, but the sixth was a rude young man who was causing a lot of trouble to the other passengers.

At last this young man got out at a station with his two heavy bags. None of the other passengers helped him, but one of them waited until the rude young man was very far away

and then opened the window and shouted to him, "You left something behind in the compartment!" Then he closed the window again.

The young man truned around and hurried back with his two bags. He was very tired when he arrived, but he shouted through the window, "What did I leave behind?"

As the train began to move again, the passenger who had called him back opened the window and said, "A very bad impression!"

一个坏印象

有六个人搭乘火车旅行，坐在同一车箱内。其中五个很安静，也很规矩。但第六个是个粗鲁的年轻人，给其他乘客招惹了许多麻烦。

最后，这位年轻人在一个车站带着两个沉重的皮箱下了车。没有一个旅客帮他的忙。有个人一直等到这位粗鲁的年轻人走得很远了，才打开窗户，对着他大声喊：“你把东西留在车厢里了!”然后，又把窗户关了起来。

年轻人转过身子，拎着两个沉甸甸的皮箱，匆匆赶了回来。他转回来时，显得非常疲倦，对着窗户大声喊：“我把什么东西留在车上了？”

当火车再次启动时，叫他回来的旅客打开窗户说：“一个极坏的印象!”

Sleeping Pills

Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.

Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."

"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"

安眠药

鲍勃晚上失眠。他去看医生，医生给他开了一些强力安眠药。{与英语有关的故事}.

星期天晚上鲍勃吃了药，睡得很好，在闹钟响之前就醒了过来。他到了办公室，遛达进去，对老板说：“我今天早上起床一点麻烦都没有。”

“好啊!”老板吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪儿去了？”

Creative

Applying for my first job, I realized I had to be creative in listing my few qualifications. Asked about additional schooling and training, I answered truthfully that I had spent three years in computer programming classes. I got the job.

I had neglected to mention that I took the same course for three years before I passed. 创造性

第一次求职时，我意识到在列举我所具备的为数不多的条件时，得有点创造性。当问及我是否受过其它的培训时，我老实地回答说我花了三年时间学计算机程序设计课。我得到了那份工作。

我没有提到那门功课我重复学了三年才考及格。

Reminder

In the veterinary office where I'm a technician, we mail out reminders when pets are due for vaccinations. Bruno, a German shepherd, arrived for his annual rabies shot, and we were required by state law to ask his owner if Bruno had bitten anyone in the last ten days. "Oh yes, in fact that's why we're here," she replied. Surprised, I told her we assumed they'd come in because of our reminder.

"We did," she explained. "Bruno bit the mail carrier who was delivering your card."

催 单

我是一家兽医站的技师。当动物到了该注射疫苗的时候，我们就寄出催单。一条德国物质牧羊犬布鲁诺来做每年一次的狂犬疫苗注射。我们依照州法律的要求询问他的主人，在过去的十天里布鲁诺是否咬了什么人。“噢，是的。事实上这正是我们到这儿来的原因，”她回答说。我觉得奇怪，告诉她我们以为他们是因为收到了我们的催单才来的。 “的确如此，”她解释道。“布鲁诺咬了给你们送催单的邮递员。”

Imitate Birds

A man tried to get a job in a stage show. "What can you do?" asked the producer.

"Imitate birds," the man said.

"Are you kidding?" answered the producer, "People like that are a dime a dozen."

"Well, I guess that's that." said the actor, as he spread his arms and flew out the window. 模仿鸟儿

一个人想在一个舞台剧中找份工作。“你能干什么呢？”负责人问。

“模仿鸟儿，”那人说。

“你在开玩笑吧？”负责人答道，“那样的人一毛钱可以找一打。”

“噢，那就算了。”那名演员说着，展开翅膀，飞出了窗口。

How Did You Ever Get Here

One winter morning, an employee explained why he had shown up for work 45 minutes late. "It was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead, I slipped back two."

The boss eyed him suspiciously. "Oh, yeah? Then how did you ever get here?"

"I finally gave up," he said, "and started for home."

你是怎样来的？

一个冬天的早晨，一名雇员解释他为什么迟到了四十五分钟才起来上班。“外面太滑了，我每向前迈一步，就要向后退两步。”

老板狐疑地看着他。“噢，是吗？那你是怎样到这里来的？”

“后来我决定放弃，”他说，“然后我就往家里走。”

Three Surgeons

Three famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off," said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist."

"That's nothing," said another. "A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner."

"I can top both of you," said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse's posterior - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate."

三个外科医生

三个有名的外科医生正在吹嘘他们的技术。“一个人断了一只手，他来找我，”一个说，“如今那个人是个音乐会的小提琴手。”

“这算不了什么，”另一个说。“一个家伙两条腿断了，他来找我，我将它们接了回去。如今，那人是马拉松选手。”

“我比你们两个都强，”第三个说，“一天，我碰到一起可怕的车祸。除了一个马屁股，和一幅眼睛，什么都没有留下。如今，那人坐在美国参议院里。”

One Side of the Case

A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand.